Tuesday, January 11, 2005
mY hEad sEem sO hEavy .. iN thE sEnsE oF fEel dIzzNess..haZi..sIanZ..eVErythiNg gOne baD..uNhAppy aBout sOme sTuff yEsTeRdAe..toDae bEttEr lEh..aM i tAt jiA lAt..bEing sOmeOne gF,thAt i cAnt eVen hELp hIm to gaIn coNfidEnt,oR rAthEr, i aM quIte thE maIn rEasOn tAt He lOsE coNfiDent.eveRythIng SeEm to bE mY fAult.. *baD* dDnt reAli kNow wAt i kNow,wIll reSult in hIm loSing coNfiDent.Not dO,bUt dDnt saE. liKe i jUz Kept qUiet. i dUn wAn saE Until sO sUre,bEcOz fUture whO kNow? but i wOnt chAnge ... not withIn thEse yeArs,beCoz i kNow hOw i fElt.aNd i knOw i woNt.jUz tAt i dUn wAn saE oUt,bEcOz i dun wAn lAter aNythIng haPpen,*chOy* thEn iTs liKe wAt i sAe,itS mEant nothIng lIke tAt. thEn lIke i bEcoMe thE liaR,thE dEvil..evErything..wAteVer.. i kNow whAt i aM fEeling,aNd i aM sUre.
wEnt fOr thE mEeting yEstErdae At cAthay.mEet jUn yiNg at sChool b4 goIng thEre. reAch thEre..liSten thEm tok aLl thAt..uNtil 9pM.iS sIanz..and bOring..haBing to kNow mOre n mOre rules..i aM sIck,tiRed n sIanz about woRking cAthay reAli. wAtever rules thEy saE,itS sEem sO eASy to thEm.thoSe woRking n haBing to dO thAt aLway wiLL fiNd it tiRing.. baD jOb.. baD pAy..siAnz.. dUn wAn strUck thEre 4 lOng.. But i sImplY cAnt fiNd aNothEr jOb tat haB sUch a timE fLexiBilty bEtwEen thIs sTudying pEriod,whIch aLlow mE to wOrk n sTudy.
daRz's mUm bIrthDae oN sUndae. haB not thought of wAt prEsEnt to gEt foR hEr..mM..heaDaChe.idEas aNyonE?
YYY
Memories that fades
11:21 PM